Friendships and Loneliness

I don't think I have encountered much worse than losing people you love. Over the years I have made some true friendships that I hope will last a lifetime, but a few months ago I had to say goodbye to all of those people.

The first few days of being without someone makes you realise just how much you relied on that person. My friends have always been there for me. They know when I am in a bad mood and how to cheer me up, they laugh at my awful jokes and appreciate my slight stupidity. Not having them physically close to me breaks my heart a little and though that may sound dramatic it kind of is the truth. Being lonely is not something I thought I had experienced before, but losing friends you have had for the past 2, 7 and 13 years of your life, hurts. You have to tell them how things are going over the phone and whilst yes, you can still talk, it is not the same as being face to face. Do not get me wrong I have met some amazing new friends upon my time in university but there is still that hole of my friends miles away. It is an alienating thing.

It is not all doom and gloom as I know we will see each other as much as we can and when we do it will be special. We will make the most of the time we have together and I hope these people never leave my life completely but I wish them all the best for their futures.

Just because someone has walked out of your life it does not mean that you will never fill that hole, you have the memories that will remind you of the moments you spent together, you shall meet new people and make even more memories.

Body Image

Body image is a thing that many people struggle with, including me. I constantly have battles in my mind about whether I like the way I look on a certain day and I will not lie, more often than not I do not. I have good days and bad days. I have days where I see a picture of another girl and want to look like her and days where I don't mind what I see in the mirror. Sometimes I hate my short legs, other days I like them. Yes I have small boobs, do I want bigger ones? Maybe. Sometimes I want to be skinnier and others I want to be curvier. The amount you love yourself stems from your mental outlook on your own body.

We are used to seeing so many idealistic body shapes in todays society, whether it be curvy, toned or skinny. Though the media now displays a larger variety of body types, it still doesn't erase the issue of people being able to love themselves. Yes, girls and boys are no longer faced with just one ideal figure in magazines, but that still doesn't change the struggles people face mentally. You either always want to be curvier, stronger or skinnier. 

Loving yourself is what is important and accepting the fact that your body is the shape it is. No matter how hard you try it you might not be able to physically become the shape you so desire as you were born the way you are for a reason. Each person on this planet is different and no one worth less because of the way they look or dress. 

Starting University

When talking to people about starting university the first things most people ask you is 'are you excited?' or they say 'you'll have the time of your life'.

I was terrified.

I didn't get the grades I wanted in my A-levels and that made university seem all that little bit more scary to me. I was filled with anxiety over the fact I didn't feel smart enough and that I would fall fast behind. I have always been a perfectionist and so for me those thoughts I was having were hard to overcome in my head.

I have also never been the type of person who was good with change. I spent the majority of my summer anticipating the big move to university, going onto the next chapters of my life. Saying goodbye to the people I love most was difficult and it is still hard to be apart from them. I miss spending time with the close friends I made in my life, but they too now live miles from home. It can be lonely, even though I know the goodbye is not forever. However, not having that safety network of people who have been there for you through all the good and bad times in your life can be daunting and lonely. Most of all, I would say not having your Mum there with your dinner waiting on the dinner table when you come home or you having to do your own washing, really makes you appreciate all the things your family did for you and makes coming home feel like you are staying in a 5 star hotel.

But it is true when people say you will meet some amazing new people in university, as I know I have. I have settled into life on my own and I am learning about a subject I love, so I guess life is going okay.

Vegan Skincare Routine

I never used to be that into skincare, I was more into my makeup. But as time has progressed I wear less makeup and spend more of my time looking at skincare in shops that I do eyeliners and mascaras. I think it is all about growing up and finding what you truly feel comfortable in and for me that is quite minimal makeup most of the time. Because I got more into skincare I have been doing more and more research on the products that are best suited to me and found the benefits of using more natural products opposed to cleansers filled with parabens and chemicals that are not great for the skin and have been linked to skin cancers. So,  after a lot of product switches I have finally fine-tuned my skincare routine to what works best for me, with all of the products containing mostly natural ingredients and of course being vegan and cruelty free.

Cleanser
The first step is cleansing and in the morning the cleanser I have been using for many months now is the Safa Cleansing Milk. It is a lovely gentle cleanser that I use every morning to wash away any residue that may have gathered over night. It doesn't dry out the skin as there are no harsh chemicals in it, I have found it one of the few cleansers I have tried that does not break me out either!

Scrub
In the night time I like to use a scrub and my scrub of choice is Lush's Ocean Salt, this may be no surprise to you if you read my Lush Vegan Favourites post. I adore this scrub with its natural ingredients packed full of benefits for your skin. The salt crystals exfoliate your skin leaving it feeling rejuvenated and refreshed. This is a definite top recommendation of mine.

Toner
After washing my face I use a toner, again no surprise here that the toner I use is Lush's Tea Tree Toning Water. This again is a lovely natural toner that refreshes the skin and helps to combat any spots you have with its antibacterial properties.

Moisturiser
I tend to switch between two moisturizers, the Yes to Tomatoes Daily Balancing and the Sukin Oil Balancing, Mattyifying one, which is a recent purchase. Both are made up of mostly natural ingredients without SLS, Parabens and other harsh chemicals. I prefer to go for a moisturizer targeted for my oily skin but these brands do offer other alternatives for different skin types.

Tea Tree
This is the only product I ever use to treat my spots. It's natural and simple which is the best approach to take when it comes to your skin. I also find it is very effective in reducing the redness on my skin, which is what tea tree is best suited for as it is a great anti inflammatory and anti bacterial, making it perfect for spot treatment.

Oil
Sometimes before I moisturise I use an oil and my favourite is the Rejuvenating Coconut Body Oil by ArgaNaturals. I do this about once to twice a week when I want my skin to have that extra little boost.

Mask
My favourite face mask to use is an old favourite of mine and one of the first Lush products I purchased. It's Lush's Cupcake, that is targeted towards problematic skin. I use this up to three times a week when I feel that my skin needs it and apply it after I have cleansed my skin.

Makeup Remover
To remove my makeup at the end of the day I use coconut oil or Superdrug's B Micellar Water. They both do a really great job, but if I am feeling lazy I will often just use the Micellar Water, as then I may skip my scrub and just go straight into my toner and moisturiser.

SPF
It is really important to protect your skin every day against harmful UV rays. This is my last step before putting on makeup and at the moment I use the Safa Organic Sun Lotion. This is good for protection and is affordable but it can sometimes be hard to rub into the skin without leaving little white balls but all in all it is a great sunscreen to go for.

I hope you enjoyed reading about my current skincare routine that works for me. I would love to do more vegan routines, such as my haircare bodycare, so keep a look out for those coming soon!

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