The Reality of Second Year

So second year is over abruptly. Though yes I am still online doing my work, we had to make a unexpected move out of the house and move back home. To me it feels like this year is over, learning is still going on but the rest of the uni experience is over and I am kind of sad about it.

Second year, the first year where grades actually count for something, which is sightly terrifying. This year overall has been a lot more fun but with a few more breakdowns and more stress. Yes, the end of second year was tough and frustrating, with strikes left right and centre and coronavirus everywhere, it wasn't the worst year ever. This year consisted of several breakdowns, over what I couldn't tell you (I have no clue), but my friends definitely are what made this year more enjoyable, even during social distancing. 

Going into second year I wasn't really that excited to delve back into the whole learning process after what felt like forever off, because let's be honest 4 months is a long time. Being used to only 6 weeks between summer and a new term, I was very rusty in the first few weeks to say the least. This time around it took a lot more effort to get my motivational juices flowing but they came eventually (I think). In second year the content tends to become more specialised towards your actual degree, everything is a bit less broad, and that is what I have really loved about second year. I love learning more about specific marine life rather than just general biology. So for me I had modules based around vertebrates, marine species physiology and behaviour and marine ecology. Ecology and marine vertebrates, is something I want to specialise in the future so I did love the modules this year.

Depending on your living situation you tend to live in a house in second year rather than halls, and this gives you a lot more comfort and freedom. Living with your friends and just chilling in front of the TV with mario kart is a lot more enjoyable than being stuck in a dingy box room, which is what is struggled with mentally last year. In second year you feel more at home, you aren't really adjusting to university life anymore. Though stress and anxiety may be on the up, with an increased work load and pressure to get good grades that actually have to go towards your final grade. That along with starting to some what choose dissertation topics and the looming final year of university just around the corner, can be quite daunting (unless like me you are thinking of a masters to put of the impending doom of adult hood). This to me is slightly terrifying as, if I am honest, I am a perfectionist and this year has not been going too perfect grades wise, but I am hoping to pull it back in the online exams.

Overall learning gets harder, exams are tougher and overall motivation may be lacking in second year. However, the overall university experience in my opinion gets better. Do not revise too hard and make sure you have time to spend with your friends, have fun because it is nearly all over. I think my second year experience, like many others, is one that hopefully will not be repeated. Next year will hopefully be a little bit more on the normal front but I have no doubt it will bring another tonne of stress to add to my pile.

Around a year ago I posted my reality of first year of university, so if you are starting university next year and want to read it click here

Moving Away From Fast Fashion

In today’s climate it is important to think about becoming more sustainable, whether that be by reducing your plastic usage or going vegan. One topic people are unaware of however, is the impact of the fast fashion industry. We talk about the water usage involved in factory farming methods, though did you know it can take around 300 million gallons of water to create just one cotton t-shirt, with clothing also taking nearly 100 years to decompose in landfill when you get bored of it. The fashion industry is worth trillions of pounds and is the second highest polluting industry on earth, contributing to 10% of the worlds global carbon emissions.

The fast fashion industry hides low paid, badly treated workers and use of toxic harmful chemicals that in turn are harming our waters. The workers of this industry do not have rights and only 2% of them actually earn the living wage, not able to support their families after working all day in gruelling conditions. This needs to stop, no person should have to work in such conditions for a toxic industry.

More so than ever people are realising the implications of fast fashion, stop placing endless orders on ASOS without knowing the effects it is causing. You are contributing to the second biggest polluter on our planet. How many times do you wear that new top you bought? How many clothes have you thrown out? There are alternatives to the fast fashion industry.

Shop at Charity Shops
A simple and cheap way to avoid fast fashion. I do this all the time! I find amazing one of a kind pieces in charity shops, you have just got to keep an eye out. Along with charity shops there is Depop online, where you can search for what you want and find some gems. These are great alternatives to fast fashion shopping and often end up being a whole lot cheaper. I used to spend a lot of money at places like Topshop or New Look, now, however I can spend less than £20 and get lots of amazing pieces that no one else will have! Rather than throwing out your clothes into landfill, donate them to charities so that someone who really needs clothes can enjoy the items you never wear anymore.  You could even repurpose your old clothes, adjust them, find new ways to wear them that doesn't involve throwing them out.

Shop Sustainably
There are companies out there who make sustainable clothing items and treat their workers fairly, with suitable pay. More and more companies are popping up with good ethics behind their clothing items, you just have to know where to look. Companies like TALA are great alternative to fast fashion gym wear brands, they use ethically sourced materials and landfill waste to create their items and pay their workers fairly. Lucy and Yak is an ethically sourced company selling beautiful clothing items. If you are looking for sustainably made underwear then Organic Basics is a great place! They use eco-friendly materials to make their items and sell all the basics you will need. Yes, these shops may be a little on the pricer side but you are not just paying more for nothing. You are paying more so that their workers get fair pay, you are paying more for good quality materials that won't just break after a week of wear, you are paying for sustainability that will work out cheaper for you in the long run. Why do you think fast fashion websites and shops sell items so cheap? Because of the use of cheap materials and low paid workers.

Not everyone has to be perfect with this movement, but aiming to buy less fast fashion items will help the planet immensely. We need to put an end to flash sales on cheaply made items and pull together to help make a more sustainable fashion industry.

A Low Waste Skincare Wishlist

I do wish that I had all the money in the world to spend on sustainable skincare, as half of the stuff I lust after does not come cheap. There are so many sustainable and plastic free alternatives for your skincare favourites that are kind on the planet. I am transitioning my current skincare and makeup items towards being plastic free. First, however, I am using up any old products that are still in my cupboard and then when they run low I shall purchase a kinder alternative. This way nothing gets wasted in the process. Some of my favourite places to shop for low waste items is Lush, with their pot return policy so nothing is thrown away and also Plastic Freedom, a plastic free online website with a great variety of everything you could possibly need without any cruelty involved.

1. Lush Enzymion Cream
Moisturisers are what tends to be the bug bare of my purse as plastic free and sustainable moisturisers don't come cheap. I have scoured the internet looking for an affordable option that also targets oily, spot prone skin. I am yet to come across an affordable one, though on my current wishlist is Lush's Enzymion, a mattifying moisturiser that doesn't skin out on hydrating your skin. the citric juices in the cream help make your skin look fresh and kill off any dead skin cells.

2. Wild Sage + Co Oil Cleanser for Oily Skin
There are so many alternatives to your average facial cleanser that can be kinder to the planet. Finding products that are targeted towards oily skin however I tend to struggle with. Currently on my Wishlist is this product that comes completely plastic free, with a pot return policy also! This natural skincare helps target acne and blackheads to help clear your skin.

3. Cupcake Face Mask
Lush always holds a place in my heart for face masks, I have used them for years. With their pot returning policy they are also kind on the environment and the company themselves stand for great ethics. On my current list is the Cupcake face mask. This used to be a favourite of mine when I was 16 and struggled more with spots. It smells delightful and absorbs excess oil from your face to give you a less oily finish.

4. Lani Tropical Night Serum
An oil isn't something I can use daily as I do have quite oily skin naturally, but when my face is lacking moisture or looking a little tired, I like to use some to liven it up. Only problem being they do not come cheap and so I am saving up to add this product to my skincare routine. Lani Tropical Night Serum restores the moisture in your skin and allows it to maintain its elasticity. Lani is an amazing company to support and are advocates for cruelty free beauty items!

6. Vegan Amazing Mineral Butter Suncream SPF 30
Finding a suncream that protects my fair complexion but that is also kind for the environment has proven harder that you may think. Most do not provide a high enough UV protection for me (a ginger who needs at least SPF 30 on holiday). That is when I found the Amazing Mineral Butter Suncream, plastic free packaging, vegan and a high enough SPF to stop my burning. A perfect product for those who want to stay protected but remain kind to the environment.

It is easier than ever to take the step towards being plastic free and reducing your overall waste. It is becoming an ever more pressing issue that people are considerate about their waste, as oceans become dumping grounds and landfill sites are bursting at the seams. Inconsiderate disposal of waste leads innocent animals lives to be cut short or hindered. There is no time better than now to reduce your waste!

Deeplight Review

Deeplight by Frances Hardinge was a very different book to anything I have read. I know they say you shouldn't pick a book based on the front cover but this time, being the ocean lover that I am, I caved. Though upon reading the blurb I was very intrigued about this books storyline.

Set in an alternate reality in chains of islands of the Myriad, where gods once rose from the Undersea and ruled, Hark and Jelt now live. Years ago the Gods destroyed each other by the power of their hearts, leaving their 'godware' behind. 14 year old Hark scapes through life scavenging for this powerful 'godware' to earn his way. However, a failed endeavour leaves him paying his debts to a scientist. There he discovers a still beating 'godware' heart, not truly understanding the full power it still holds. Hark knows is he needs to keep it out of prying hands, though uses it to save his friend who is near death, due to Jelts dangerous antics and unwillingness to leave Hark alone. It appears there are repercussions to this act, as Jelt begins to change into something unrecognisable to Hark. He is forced to leave his friend behind that is if he isn't already lost. 

This world was a beautiful creation and is intricately described like nothing I have ever read before, that is what kept me wanting to read more. The tales of the 'sea kissed' (those who are deaf from their time at sea) tell an intricate tale of the Myriad that is compelling to the reader to delve further into this world. The relationship between Hark and Jelt is complex and based around friends who once had no one else but each other, until Hark moved on leading to Jelt's jealousy to grow ever fonder. This storyline has a fascination with the sea in an alternate reality and it is mesmerising to read about, as the characters themselves still resemble the behaviours of humans in todays world. This book is something different to delve into but it is something I recommend you to do. A complex yet welcoming universe that you cannot help but keep coming back to.

Vegan | 4 Years On

It's me again, checking in on the whole veganism thing, with it now being 2020 I have been vegan for 4 years. I can confidently say the this past year I have not slipped up and drunkly ate some chicken, I now stick to the vegan kind of drunk foods.

I think 2019 and 2020 have been the year for vegan foods there is so much variety on the shelves these days. Even in lockdown people are choosing to bulk buy vegan food that they may not usually eat, yes this may be because their usual food has run out, but it’a good business for the vegan companies. Though a little annoying for the vegans who now have lacking choice of food.

This past year of being vegan I have put of the most muscle mass I have in my life, so everyone saying that vegan lifters cannot build muscle, prove me wrong. I have increased muscle mass and upped my weight to a healthy set point for me on a full vegan diet that is (for the most part) full of good food, if we discount all the burgers and tubs of ice cream I consume. A vegan diet keeps me full and satiated to carry out my workouts based around strong compound movements. No I do not need chicken or eggs to fuel my deadlifts or squats. I sometimes take a vegan protein if I am feeling like it but often enough I get enough protein from the whole foods I eat, and yes ice cream is included as a whole food in my world.

A vegan diet has helped me to truly love my body for how strong it now is and how cruelty free my life is thanks to veganism. Being vegan helped me to fall in love with food again, it helped me to be balanced and love myself. It is the most sustainable thing any one of you can do to help the planet. It drastically reduces water usage around the globe and cuts the need for cruel factory farming methods, saving innocent lives. It can save on thousands of gallons of water and grains that can be used to feed those people in need. It is also much better for your health, with reduced cholesterol levels and blood pressure. I personally believe that veganism is the only way forward for our planet to be sustainable as the way we are currently going about life just isn’t. We can’t continue mass producing cruelty. Factory farming isn’t sustainable and frankly isn’t humane either. Most diseases these days exist as a result of animal consumption by humans, the pandemic we are in the midsts of caused someone eating a raw bat, the only question I ask is why? Swine flu, from pigs. This surely tells you that animal consumption is not the answer for human health, it is the better interest of ourselves and the planet to go vegan or at least make steps towards it.

Some Books I Recommend

With time on our hands right now I thought I would share some of my recent favourite books that I highly recommend. Most of these books are part of a series so this list shall keep you busy for the foreseeable future.

1. Wolf by Wolf

This is a book I read many years ago, and still I hold it near the top of my favourite books. Based in the year 1956 under the rule of the Third Riech and Imperial Japan Rule. A victorious Hitler and Emperor Hirohito created an Axis tour, a motorcycle race across the continents. It follows the story of Yael, a former death camp prisoner and part of the resistance, a character I grow to love. She possess five wolf tattoos representative of people she has lost. She is given the task to win the Axis Tour and murder Hitler. Yael is no ordinary girl, she has the ability to skin shift, a side effect of her tortures, giving her the ability to complete her task impersonating last years Axis tour champion, Adele Wolf. People of Adeles past present challenges for Yael as she grows ever closer to her fellow competitors. This book follows her journey in her assassination attempt of Hitler and her struggle to decide what is right for her.

2. Throne of Glass

This series is truly encapsulating and I have a love for Sarah J. Maas' work. It follows the life of a former prisoner in Endovier, 18 year old assassin Celaena Sardonthien. She is offered release by the Prince Dorian, on the condition she is to be his champion, in a contest to find the new royal assassin. Should she win, she will be granted freedom after 4 years service as assassin for the crown. One by one rounds of the contest are completed and one by one contestants end up dead. This book follows Celaena dealing with life outside Endovier and her life in court, amongst deadly situations she finds herself in. This is the first book in a mesmerising series.

3. A Darker Shade of Magic 

Kell is a traveller and the last of his kind, he serves the Maresh Empire as an ambassador, though behind closed doors he is a smuggler moving between Red London and dull Grey London. His luck runs out as a transaction goes awry, he escapes Grey London running into Delilah Bard, a cunning thief. She robs him only to them save his life from a known enemy, in return she wants adventure. Little do the two know, darkness is around the corner as magic is on treacherous grounds.

4. An Ember in the Ashes 

Inspired by Ancient Rome in the Martial Empire, defiance leads to death. Those who do not give themselves to the empire face blood and death. Laia a slave girl, lives in this world, her and her family do not challenge the empire. Though one day her brother is arrested and so things change. In promise of saving her brother Laia promises to spy on the court within the military academy for the rebels. There she meets Elias, a talented, secretly unwilling soldier. He longs to be free just like Laia and so it appears there destinies become intertwined, as they both question the Empires rule.

5. Travellers in the Third Riech

A bit of a different read for me, though I still couldn't put it down. This book describes the history of the rise of the Nazi's to power from first hand accounts of all types of people. These accounts help you relive a three dimensional German world. This book gave me a sense of despair for the people involved as they tell their accounts of what their lives were like in a time so tragic.

Feeling Low in Lockdown?

Around this weird time it is normal to feel low. Having to be forced to stay inside and away from your friends and family is a tough situation. Feeling down in times like this is okay, just know that you are not alone. Yes, it may feel like no one understands because no one is there to listen, but trust me in saying, everyone across the whole world is feeling somewhat the same as you right now.

This is a tricky time, especially for those suffering with mental health issues. Do not let yourself fall into a rut doing nothing and getting stuck in your own thoughts. Keep yourself busy, learn a new hobby. Who knows what you will become a pro at during this lockdown? You have the time to do that thing you have always wanted to do, keep your mind busy. During this time I have retaken up reading and trust me in saying I have plenty of books to keep my mind busy. Reading helps my mind wander from the harsh realities of what is going on around us and it takes my mind off missing my friends. Now, I have taken up writing again, 100th time lucky? maybe I will actually stick to it this time for longer than a few weeks. I do these things because I know if I do not keep busy, I will most likely go insane stuck inside, and this is coming from a naturally introverted person.

Some calming hobbies

• Reading 
• Painting 
• Colouring
• Embroidery 
• Working out
• Go for a walk
• Learning new things 

You will get through this sad time, just remember you are not in it alone. There are things you can get out of this weird situation we are living.

Hi, It's Me Again

Oh look she disappeared again. Hi, I am back for now I guess. With everything that has been going on around the world lately, I wanted to come back to my safe space to take my mind of everything, because let us be honest, right now, nothing feels real. The world is in a crazy place right now and for some that can be quite hard to cope with. Lockdown is tough when you rely on your friends to keep your sprits up during tough times, it can feel lonely, but everyone is with you in this. 

So yes I left for awhile, again. University got hard and frustrating. All our assignments were given to us in the same month, just before the whole world went up in flames. If I am honest, 2020 has been a little bit crap if you ask me and I have been struggling to remain positive. But after making a rather fast departure from my university home, I am now bored of staying inside, though I know it is for a good reason, and so here I am. Life will soon go back to 'somewhat normality' and this will all be in the past, but for now we all have to stay home and stay safe.

There are positives to come out of this though. Have you seen the latest pollution levels around the world? significantly down, and yes this is probably just temporary but it is still a good thing. Dolphins swimming in the canals of Venice? beautiful. Everywhere animals roaming around the bare streets, it is rather amusing to say the least. All it took was a global pandemic for the world to start healing again. Take a walk outside and take in the silence, the fresher air. I am not going to talk much about the whole looming virus, as quite frankly I am sick of hearing about it and cannot wait for the day that this is over. 

For the time being however, I am sticking to keeping myself busy, learning, reading and now writing it seems. I do not want to promise I will continue writing but it is something I am going to do for now, for the few people who read this and for myself. 

Everyone stay safe and inside, this will all blow over soon.

The Past Decade

I was once a girl who dressed in bright clothes and odd headbands. 10 years later, I am still that girl.

What has this past decade taught me? Well I started the 2010’s as a bright eyed, energetic 10 year old. I was a classic tom boy who loved climbing and swimming but also loved reading. Fast forward 10 years I’m now a less more energetic 20 year old who along the way has fought some battles, met some beautiful people and the most terrifying part is I became an adult.

The thing they do not teach you growing up is how to deal with emotions and changes going on with your body and life. From the age of 10 to 20 my body has gone through a lot of changes. I’ve been from primary school, to secondary school, to sixth form and now to uni. I made friends, I lost friends. I learnt a whole lot and not just to do with the academic side of things.

At the start of the decade I was faced with the excitement and nerves that came with starting secondary school. I loved learning and knew I was going to a new school with some of my best friends. A new beginning was what I wanted.

When I turned 12 I struggled with the changes that was happening in my life and in order to deal with it I turned to controlling behaviours surrounding food. For me this part of the decade was one of my toughest. I was blindsided as to what I was doing to my body and was hurting the people around me. I was consumed in my thoughts and do not really remember a whole lot from this time as I mentally blocked it out. 2012-2013 was rather tough on me mentally but I got through it and learnt a lot about myself in doing so, I used to not like what I saw in the mirror and now almost 8 years later I have learned to love and accept my figure.

2013 was the year I started this blog. I wanted somewhere to create, somewhere I could write about the things I was passionate about. Yes, overtime my passions have changed and I have taken many breaks from this site. But looking back I am glad I did this, I am proud of what I write about even if not many people see it and I think I will always come back to writing as a way to express myself.

2014, year 9, not a whole lot to say, not a lot happened, a walk in the park compared to all the other years if you ask me

2015, the start of GCSE’s, the start of the stress. The perfectionist I am I tried my hardest these years, I revised my butt off and stressed maybe a little too much. Now I know those results do not mean a whole lot to anyone, they probably weren’t worth the stress I put myself under, but I got the results I wanted and results I am proud of. I also began my veganism journey and expanded my knowledge on the harsh realities of animal cruelty, this year was when I started to want to make a difference to help.

2016 marked the start of sixth form. Moving schools again was a daunting prospect to a girl who is now more reserved and quiet when compared to her 10 year old self. I liked to stay out of gossip and not draw attention to myself, I liked fitting in. Sixth form was the biggest jump for me. We were thrown into a group of people who already knew each other, all had their own groups and a completely new environment. I was nervous but quickly found my feet in my new lessons and settled into a group of friends who welcomed the new kids with open arms

2017, where I loved sixth form and got into the swing of the new school fully. I had experienced so many new things, had relationships, learnt the stresses of the A-level workload and been to a few parties. All of this was new to the quiet now 17 year old me, but here was where I came out of my shell and developed more as a person to who I am today and I am thankful for the experiences I had in sixth form. I was comfortable in my body, I started the gym and no longer wanted to just ‘fit in’.

2018 was the final year before I was set free to move away to uni. This year I continued to grow as a person, I found myself and became a girl I am proud to be. I learnt to never be ashamed of what happens in your past because it makes you who you are today. This year impacted my mental health, something I hadn’t really thought of since 2013. Stress got the better of me and I found myself struggling with my A-levels, no matter how hard I revised. This year again was tough but I got through it with the help of friends and family and managed to get into my chosen university that was Bangor.

Moving away from home was daunting. I have always been a home body who didn’t enjoy being away, but I had to give it a try. I moved into Bangor initially not knowing anyone, I was alone for the first time in a while. I had always loved the sea and so I plunged into choosing a marine vertebrae zoology course which I still to this day love. Within the first few days I met two amazing girls and over our time at university we have become extremely close and share a whole lot with each other, they made the whole living alone situation a lot easier and I am proud to now call them my housemates. This year I also met a very special person to me. I wasn’t even really looking for him but he found me and I could not have asked for a better companion to go throw the crazy life that is university with me. With him I feel I can truly be myself and he accepts every part of me without judgement. I fell in love with the gym more than ever and I also restarted my blog wanting to write about things that I have battled with and things that I believed in.

2019 brought more university life and some crazy experiences. My course has been so insightful and interesting, something I truly do love to learn about. My friends are beautiful humans and I have met even more lovely people along the way. Yes this year may have been one of the toughest for me mentally towards the end of this year, but I have had a solid unit of friends around me to keep me going through the stress of second year and I couldn’t ask for better people to be moving into 2020 with.

So yes this past decade I have had my struggles. I have changed a whole lot. I had had up’s and downs. But this past decade I have found myself as a person and I have grown into someone I am proud to be. I learned to start to love myself and that I continue to try and do, so that I can properly love the people around me.